“Treasure your relationships, not your possessions.” ~Anthony J. D’Angelo
Relationships are not easy. Every day is a new challenge and a new adventure. There are highs and there are lows and the strength of your relationship determines how you and your partner cope up in the difficult times. Here are few everyday things that you might be doing unknowingly to annoy your partner which might be leading to some bitterness in your relationship or worse, ruining your relationship.
1. Not having enough trust in your partner
Going through your partner’s texts on phone or calling them time and again at their jobs to make sure they are only working, is not a good sign. Being possessive about your partner is one thing but keeping a tab on his activities is another. Trust is imperative in all relationships to survive. So stop checking on him rather discuss it out and have trust in him.
2. Too much of nagging
If your nagging your partner way too much and for everything he does, then back off because you might be just on the verge of killing your relationship. Nagging brings along a lot of negativity in your relationship. Complaining over and over again for one thing or the other makes you focus only on the negative things your partner does which further brings in a lot of bitterness in the relationship. So stop nagging rather start appreciating your partner and things he does for you. This will encourage him to do more such things because as per the law of attraction ‘like attracts like’.
3. Not speaking what’s on your mind
This is a major bummer in the relationships. Yes there are times when we don’t feel like telling our partner’s what’s messing up in our heads because we expect them to know it already. But let’s admit our partners might not be good at telepathy so just cut them some slack and tell them what’s bothering you, communication is very important in a relationship and not speaking up your mind might just do more harm than good.
4. Not standing up for your partner
Another major relationship wrecker. Not standing up for your partner will definitely destroy your relationship with him. Always remember that you and your partner are a team. You might have a difference of opinion with your partner but if someone is slamming him you got to stand up for your partner because you would expect the same from him if you get caught up in a similar situation.
5. Making fun of your partner in front of friends
You might find it amusing to poke a joke on your partner in front of your friends and relatives but not respecting each other’s feelings in front of others is just not healthy for a relationship. No matter how light heartedly or unintentionally you cracked a joke on him or spilled the little secret he is embarrassed about infront of his friends all in good humor, but this can actually ruin your relationship with him for sure.
6. Not listening to your partner
Yes you might be caught up in like hundreds of tasks and hence might not find time to listen to your partner or may space out while he is telling you about how his boss yelled at him today but that’s a major spoiler in a relationship. After a long day at office your partner might just want you to hear him out on how his day went. So in case you are thinking that you have other important stuff to do rather than listen to your partner, then darling you’re definitely wrong.
7. Not giving him space
If you get annoyed whenever he makes plan which doesn’t involve you, then you might be making the relationship way too suffocative for him. Everybody needs a ‘me time’ that he or she wants to spend with their friends and you need to respect that. A meeting or two with friends in a month is completely acceptable. Stopping him from doing so will just make him do so more often.
8. Avoiding solutions to arguments
If you feel you can just make him forget about the whole tantrum you threw upon each other the previous day with a gift than I’m afraid you are wrong. Avoiding a situation might bring peace in both of yours life but only temporarily. A better approach- Talk It Through. It’s better to have a conversation with a peaceful mind and coming to a solution so as to avoid such problems from coming over and over again.
9. Seeking conformity in others
Having great friends is like a blessing but if you’re committed to someone, then there are certain responsibilities that you need to take care of. There are a few things that should always be kept private amongst you two and not be shared with other people no matter how close they are to either of you. You might not be trying to betray your partner but yet your deed could be misinterpreted. Also, sharing the ill habits of your partner with your family and friends, no matter how harmless your way of doing it be, might not be a very good idea.
10. Being very critical about your partner
Though it is a very good thing in a relationship when you appreciate as well as criticize your partner over their everyday habits and choices but pointing out every little thing in their life might not give you desired results. You need to understand that your partner had a life before you came and there are certain likes and dislikes that he/she has inhabited. You should learn to understand and accept those choices. And If you must change that one little thing that bothers you a lot than try to be calm and patient while pointing it to your partner.
11. Thinking too much about the future
This is the most common reason due to which most young relationships do not work. You think too far too soon. There is a time for everything and if you want to hurry things up in a relationship or you’re thinking too much about what might happen next then your relationship is never going to work. You need to enjoy every bit of the time and deal with things as they come. Just move with the flow you guys!
